I slept in a bit this morning, as one does on a Sunday, especially in school holidays. Eventually I got out of bed, showered and dressed and began yelling at the kids to do the same. I then cooked egg and bacon rolls for the hordes, poured myself a glass of orange juice and set the kettle on to boil.
I finished my food and suggested to Adam that he might like to make the tea saying "I've boiled the kettle..." Only I hadn't. Because someone had unplugged it in order to plug in the sandwich press. And the only person who uses the sandwich press of a morning is Tom when he makes himself the egg version of toad in a hole. Tom, who with every sign of ravenous hunger had just eaten his egg and bacon roll.
"Tom," I called down the hall, "did I just feed you second breakfast?"
"Well," he replied, "I did have first breakfast earlier."
F#ck You, the People
23 minutes ago